Its Like Im Here But Im Not

Talking much about oneself can also be a means to conceal oneself. --- Friedrich Nietzsche

im always blogging yet there is no substantial thing to blog. i lack the inspiration to write, and for some reason, it has gained momentum even towards my papers. i think my brain is too tired. i need a break!

but break is coming fast, like 5 weeks from now. before the break of course, you have to strive to make the break worth it. pfft! why is it still necessary?!? damn it!

Seed made a pretty fine statement about me on his blog posti then realized that i maybe hazardous to myself. i am the complete irony of who i am. does that even make sense? i dunno. i contradict myself, and just like Pink maybe, she says on her song that, "dont let me get me, i'm my own worst enemy." maybe ive become that. Gemini friends? what's your take on this?

anyway, all i know is that ive been pretty lame in writing. i hate beating page numbers coz i end up beating around the bush and then realizing that, hey! what are you trying to say sucker? that is the worst to be i think. since taking political philo under sir lem back in the days, i have managed to practice the ability of creating brief essays that says it direct to the point while it doesnt compromise the content. it negates wordiness and senseless remarks, and just seeks to let the message come across right away. now, i am back to beating page numbers and word count, and all i know, things do not make sense. all i care about now is, heck, what more can i write to make this longer? it doesnt make sense to me.

i dunno where this is headed. im scared to write, for all i know. damn it! never in my life have i been scared in writing! i love to write, im just like wanting to write something that i know i can write about and something that i would love to write about. Writing Shakespeare does inspire me, but how come it took me endless brain vomits to even reach that point? i dunno.

good luck, and may i have the break im needing after all these shit.

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